It has been a fun couple of days. As many of you know, I am no longer involved in live radio. What does that mean? For, non-broadcasters, that simply means most of the programming we produce at Mission Network News is recorded. While it makes for good radio, you don’t have the same feel that you have when you’re doing something live. You also don’t have the same response from your listeners.
This week I was able to do live radio again. Thanks to my friend Jack Haveman at WGNB, Moody Radio. I’m filling in for Jack’s co-host Scott Curtis. It’s fun. It’s always a great time to try and put a good radio show together. Although, this week we haven’t been doing any interaction with telephone calls. I do enjoy that interaction. But, that’s just made it more challenging to make the show compelling.
This week has been a challenge for me, physically, however. I am dealing with pains and things that aren’t normal. I will be going to the doctor Friday to see if we can figure out what’s going on. It’s actually quite scary. I’ve had several friends that are dealing with cancer and I fear that.
Now please, don’t go out telling everyone, ‘Greg’s got cancer’ because it’s probably nothing. I’m 42 years old and I’m sure I’m feeling more pains because of that. But, it also makes me start thinking about my life and how I’ve lived my life.
I figure I’ve lived half my life already. The question is, how have I lived it? Have I lived it totally serving Christ? Have I loved and lived for serving others during my life? Has the sin in my life kept me from serving Him as effectively as I could have? What if God decides to plague me with something that will shake me to the core of my being? How will I react?
I don’t have good answers to all those questions. I haven’t ‘totally’ served Christ. I’ve been selfish many times. I haven’t shown love when I should have — especially to my wife and family. I fear being sick. I fear the pain that goes along with it. I fear my family being alone. But, at the same time I know going through something like that would take me to a new level in my spiritual walk with Christ.
When I experienced the problems I did in November with dizziness and numbness, I feared I was sick then. I still have those moments, but I just view it as God’s way of keeping me close to Him.
So, how am I praying? For the first time in my life (well, maybe not the first time) I’m not sure how to pray. Any suggestions?